Emmet's Fall Out Boy fix!
by UgoHale0413
Summary: Edward is stole Emmet's CD and now it's time for revenge! One shot, First fan fic. PLEASE REVIEW! Teen just incase. The 6th chapter is up. Sorry for the delay!
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own Twilight!!!!!!! Stephanie Myere does******

**Emmett's P.O.V.**

Ugh, I'm sooo bored! Edward's at Bella's house, again, Alice and Rosalie are shopping (not a surprise) and Esme is somewhere with Carlisle on his day off, and worst of all Jasper won't stop READING! Grrrr… "JASPER! Will you put down the book for one minute!?" I yelled while jumping off the couch out of frustration and utter boredom. "First, No and second you don't need to yell, remember? Super sensitive hearing." He didn't even look up from that stupid book. What is he even reading? "What are you reading that's so important?" He didn't answer this time, but a flow of annoyance swam through my body.

Omygod! I AM SO BORED! Oh I know what will lift my spirits! I ran up to my room looking for my secret stash! Be hind the picture of me and Rosalie, I got my box of my embarrassing yet secret things. Next to my Barbie's and my cheerleading outfit I found it! My fall out boy CD! Wait it wasn't there, but instead was a little note.

Dear Emmett,

I took your fall out boy CD, so don't expect to get it back Muhahahahahahaha!!!

Your brother

Edward

P.S.

What's with the half- naked Barbies? He he…

OH NO HE DIDN'T! How could he, this is outrageous! He. Will. Pay… I went to Edward's room and rip the door of the hinges then I stopped. This was way to easy for Edward, and I'm sure he stole more CD's that belonged to my other family members... I'll need back up. Jasper and Carlisle! They'll help me! Time to put my plan in action.


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay guys here's chapter 2! It's longer, but the first chapter was just to get it going. Thanks SO MUCH for the reviews! Okay here ya go! I 3 Fall Out Boy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight sigh**

Emmett's POV

Retaliation!

"Jasper, get up here!"

I didn't need to yell but it was fun. As soon as I said his name he was in front of me.

"What do you want with my eternal life?"

"Has Edward ever stolen any of your CDs?"

I was jumping up and down clapping my hands out of excitement. Note to self: spend less time with Alice.

"Yeah, why?"

Time to unravel my brilliant plan!

"Edward stole my Fall Out Boy CD!"

Jasper suppressed a laugh

"I must have itback, and I will Edward pay!"

Suddenly Jasper put on an evil face and I was actually afraid.

"I'm so in! He took my Coltrane tapes and my ..." he looked at me "never mind"

I'll ask him about it later.

"Isn't Carlisle here? It's supposed to be his day off."

"Uh… yeah, I think he is, but I haven't seen him or Esme at all today…"

Time to search for the last member of the music taker backers!

**Carlisle POV **

Stupid flowers. Take this, and this! HA HA! I hate gardening, but I will bear it for my love.

"Ah, isn't it lovely out today?"

Esme said with a smile that made me feel like a love struck human. She turned to me and looked at the flowers I planted. They were not really alive anymore, and they might be upside-down.

"I'm sorry I ruined your flowers, my love." I turned to her and smiled sheepishly.

"I think you should let _me_ do the gardening from now on." She turned to me "I don't think you were really enjoying yourself anyway."

I smiled a huge smile and gave my darling wife a kiss on the lips. Then we became more passionate.

"Yeah Carlisle!" I heard Emmett and Jasper laughing behind us.

I turned to glare at them, but something stopped me. Emmet was bouncing up and down, and Jasper had a smile on his face but her looked evil. They were up to something.

"What are you two up to?" I asked intrigued.

"We're taking back the music!" Emmett squealed. Every one looked at him. He NEEDS to stop hanging out with Alice.

Then Jasper cut in "Okay. We're stealing back the cassettes, cds, albums and any other music stuff he took from us!" he said looking more evil (if that's possible).

"I'm in. Last year he took my Cristina Aguilera CD…" Oh no! I got way too caught up into that moment. Why must I blurt things out?

Emmett and Jasper looked at each other and then fell on the floor laughing. Hey Esme is laughing at me too!

"That's not that funny!" I whined

"Yes" laugh "it" laugh is!"

"Well at least I don't play with barbies!"

Emmett looked at me shocked. Doesn't he know that we all know everyone knows about his Barbie fetish? Then we started laughing back at him

"Okay back to the task on hand" Jasper said bringing us back to the plan.

"Esme, can I go with them?"

"Like I said, let me do the gardening." Esme looked at me with amusement sparkling in her eyes. Emmet and Jasper got up and went into the living room.

"I love you." I said pecking her on the cheek. Then I ran after them so we could get back the music.

**Sorry it took me a super long time! I was really busy lately. I want to thank you again for reviews! R&R PLEASE! If you don't then Emmett can't get his fall out boy back, and Carlisle can never listen to Cristina Aguilera ever again! **

**Ugo! **


	3. Help me!

------------------------------------------- Author's note -----------------------------------------------

**Okay guys I hate Author's Notes as much as the next guy, but I'm in a pickle. I don't know how to continue or if I should quit. I have another story in the works. Now please give me ideas! I already started the next chapter and I know how I'm going to end the story, but here are some of my ideas.**

**Alice has a vision and gets Rosalie to join in with her in Emmett's evil plans. Alice then takes over.**

**Edward comes home early but everyone blocks their thoughts so they can continue with it later. **

**And that's all I got. PLEASE HELP ME!**

**From the author with a giant case of writers block,**

**UgoHale0413**


	4. Chapter 4

**OMC! I had no clue I had so many adoring fans! I really didn't think this was that great. Now I have the perfect plan! Thanks SO much.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.**

Emmett's POV

Now I had Carlisle and Jasper on my side! This is perfect! Carlisle has always devised the perfect plans and Jasper has trained in the military. Muhaha! This is going to be great!

Carlisle turned to me and asked "So what's the plan?" Carlisle and Jasper looked at me expectantly.

WHAT!? _I_ have to come up with the plan? Why me? That's why I have _them!_

I just sat there. Jasper looked at me amused "Judging by the retarded look on Emmett's face he didn't get farther then, wreck Edward's room."

Suddenly Alice and Rosalie burst through the door, with dozens of shopping bags.

Alice and Rosalie were on the couch in a second. Alice squealed, "I had a vision, and we want in!"

"What did Edward steal from you?" Carlisle asked.

"Edward took my Fergie CD." Alice said shaking her head.

"What?" Carlisle looked sick (Well as sick as a vampire could be).

"I don't get why you guys are acting so funny." I said confused, I mean really what's wrong with Fergie?

"No guy in their right mind would listen to Fergie! Now just imagine how messed up Edward is!"

Oh… I never did give her CD back now did I? My bad… I need to put it in Edward's room when no one is looking. I turned to Rosalie who was sitting next to me. She's lookin' _fine_. Ha ha it's so funny to talk like that.

Suddenly Rosalie blurted out "That a-hole stole my Rihanna CD!" Rosalie was really mad. She did that arm flailing thing that she does to me when I do something bad. He's in deep shit.

Esme's voice ran out through the house, "Rosalie Lillian Hale! Haven't I taught you better then to curse? Especially about family!" Rosalie looked like nothing happened. She's so hot when she pouts. Alice got my attention.

"Here's what I saw in my vision…"

**Alice P.O.V. **

Me and Rose were shopping in Delilah's. They have the cutest t-shirts! Rosalie was on the other side of the store when I felt a vision coming. Rose-

_Emmett was jumping on Edward's bed singing to This Ain't a Scene, it's an arms race by Fall Out boy. The song was playing throughout the room. _

_Jasper had his cell phone out and waving it in the air like a lighter. It was about 5:00pm._

_Carlisle was jumping up in down dancing. … Wow. Esme was going through Edward's CD's. Edward is going to kill them! Wait is that Rosalie?_

_Rosalie was holding a pile of CD's and sitting on Edward's couch. _

"_This ain't a sence it's a GOD DAMN ARMS RACE!!!" Emmett was screaming on the top of his lungs._

"_Emmett! What did I say about cursing?" Esme yelled back._

Suddenly I was back in the store with Rosalie. She looked at me worried. I smiled at we need to get home. _Right. Now._

It was about 3:30, so if we leave the mall now we should get home by 4:00. This will be perfect! I grabbed my bags and run (at human speed) out the door. Rosalie was soon running next to me.

"What's going on?" Rosalie asked, worried.

"I'll explain everything in the car."

30 minutes later

We pulled up in front of the house and ran in. Emmett, Carlisle and Jasper were sitting on the couch.

I ran and sat next to Jasper. I was bouncing up and down and couldn't take it any longer, "I had a vision, and we want in!" Edward has been taking our music forever, and I have the perfect plan for revenge.

**Oh, Cliffy! I want to thank everybody who gave me great ideas! I'll write more soon!**

**UgoHale0413**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue!**

**Emmett's P.O.V.**

Alice told me what she saw, and I have the perfect plan! All we need to do is…

"So, I think _I _should take over this operation." Alice said triumphantly.

Nooo! That's my job! I came up with the idea she can't just butt in! No one would want her to be in charge. I mean I have the plan and the dashing good looks. Wait, was everyone agreeing with her? How dare they!

"Hold on!" I yelled "this is my operation, and I think it would be better if I stay in charge."

Everyone froze and looked at one another. Are they really thinking of getting rid of me and putting Alice in charge?

"You guys are going to get rid of me? I was the one who came up with this ingenious plan… er, idea!" Everyone looked at the floor except for Alice who was nodding her head.

"Well Alice is less likely to mess everything up." Jasper said

"And she'll see when Edward is coming, so we can get out of his room before he catches us." Carlisle said

"And I have the perfect plan! It's…"

"Hey! Have you ever considered I have an awesomely, amazing, totally outrageous plan?!"

Carlisle was the first one to speak up "Emmett, if you feel so strongly about this lets have a vote," What is he thinking? There are only three of them when me and Alice aren't voting!

Here are the rules to the…" Suddenly Carlisle stopped and looked at Alice. Why is everyone obsessed with her? I mean really I should be calling the shots.

Suddenly Alice stiffened and her eyes glazed over, and we all knew she was having a vision.

Jasper was at her side staring at her worried. Carlisle was sitting on the couch looking calm as ever, Rosalie was sitting next to me filing her nails, which was weird because the file just snaps in half whenever she tries to actually file her nails down.

Suddenly Alice woke up from her vision and turned to me and smiled.

"There's no need for the vote anymore Carlisle." Alice was still smiling and it was really creepy. I looked at Jasper and he was smiling too. I don't think he was doing it on his own because his eye's looked really freaked out.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean you should be fully responsible for everything and all out comes that happen because of you beautiful plan." She was batting her eyelashes at me. I don't think I should trust her, but I'm in charge!

"You're finally seeing my way! Okay so here is the plan! We're going to go into Edward's room," I stopped because I wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page.

"Carlisle and Jasper will collect the CDs that we want and if you see anything interesting we'll keep that too." Carlisle and Jasper nodded.

"Alice you'll be on guard duty the entire time. If Edward comes home early..." Crap! It would be really bad if he comes home before we're done. What's the one thing that will stop him from killing us again? BELLA! "If Edward comes home early then you'll get Bella and hold her captive. She'll join us and if he tries to attack any of us we'll use her powers over him."

Rosalie looked mad at me. I'll give her something fun to do. "Rosalie I'll give you the funnest job of all! You get to reek havoc upon Edward closet." Rosalie looked so excited. I can't wait to see Edward's face!

"So Emmett what will you be doing?" Jasper asked.

He probably thought I would just sit around and dance, but no! I will do the most forbidden thing you could ever do to Edward. "I am going to wreck Edward's car."

An unnecessary gasp was heard throughout the room.

"Emmett I think this may be getting too extreme." Rosalie said worried

The Jasper joined into the fight, "Yeah, that's almost as bad as threatening to bite Bella."

Then Alice said "Well, we wouldn't have to worry about that if Edward would stop being so freaking stupid." I felt Rosalie tense next to me.

"Alice what did I say about cursing!?" Esme was yelling again.

"All I said was freaking!" Alice said trying to defend her self.

"I still hate that word!" Esme walked into the living room with dirt still on her pants. She was glaring "the glare" at Alice. Dear god what is Alice doing? She can't win against Esme.

"But-" Esme cut her off "Carlisle talk some sense into her!"

At that moment Carlisle was dragged into this pointless, yet entertaining argument. I looked over at Rosalie and put my arm around her. She looked troubled, like when she thinks.

"Rose you alright?" She turned and looked at me seriously. Uh oh, that's the "you're about to do something incredibly stupid" look.

"Emmett I don't think you should wreck Edward's car." I tried to talk but she cut me off before I could talk. "You no talk. I talk. Reason number one, Edward will set you on fire." Oh, that would be bad… "Second reason, I spent a lot of time on that car so I would get mad," Ohhhh… that's super duper bad. "and if you go and do it, when I told you not to, there will be no sex," GASP! "_**ever again**_" Oh dear god!!!

"Fine whatever you say! I will not touch his car, I swear!" I cannot let her take sex away! That's my favorite pass time!

"When I looked over at the others Alice looked pissed and Esme look triumphant. Ha ha!

I stood up from the couch "Okay guys let's get started!"

Bella P.O.V.

Edward and I were sitting on my couch in the living room doing our homework. Well, it was more like I was doing my homework and Edward was rewriting his from, like, ten years ago, and I was sitting on his back trying to read out of a text book while he was laying down under me. In a flash Edward was sitting upright, and I was thrown into a heap on the ground.

"What the heck? Edward you didn't catch me!" I was like he didn't even hear me. "Edward?" He was really starting to freak me out.

"Something feels terribly wrong…" Edward looked at me.

"OhmygodBellaIdidn'tmeantothrowyouontheground!" He was talking really fast like Alice does.

"Edward what's wrong?" What's happening? Is someone coming? Is Victoria here? Oh my god I'm going to die! I was a mess on the ground

"I think we should get to my house" Edward said flustered he picked me up off the ground, and he dragged me out into his car.

"Edward you're scaring me." I whispered. He looked at me sadly.

"I don't know what's going on; it just feels like something is going terribly, terribly wrong." Well at least I'm not going to die in the very near future. _**Hopefully**_ in the future but not the very close future by some crazy vampire that wants to kill me for revenge. When I looked over at Edward he was going over 110 mph!

"Edward do know what's happening or id this just a feeling? Did Alice have a vision or something?" He turned and looked at me.

"I don't know. It's just feels like something positively horrible is going to happen!" I've never seen Edward like this. He was all jumpy and nervous, totally unlike the calm graceful Edward I'm used to. We the rest of the ride was silent except for the purr of the engine.

When we pulled up to the Cullen's mansion I heard music playing. Was that Fall out boy? Suddenly the doors burst open and I was picked up by Alice and brought into the living room where she looked the doors behind her.

"Alice what the hell is going on?" She was dragging me up the stairs then turned toward Edward's room.

"Don't let Esme hear you talking like that, and we need you for protection." Me protecting vampires? What's going on?

"Alice what exactly-" I was pulled into Edward's room.

"My god what did you do?!"

**Muhaha! Cliffy! You'll just have to wait until the next chapter to see what they did to poor Edward, and what Edward is going to do back!**

**Ugo!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys just to remind you it's not mine (sadly)**

Emmett's P.O.V.

So our plan is going swimmingly! He, he that's such a funny word, I bet Carlisle uses it a lot… hmm.

"Hey Carlisle how do you think my plan is working out?" He turned to look at me. Say swimmingly! SAY IT!

"I think it is going," pause "very well." He turned back around to face Jasper who was smiling. He's probably laughing at my disappointment. Aw man I thought it would work. I went to help Alice blockade all the doors and windows in case Edward did come back. What if he did come home early and everything goes wrong? By wrong I mean me having fun then him tackling me to the ground, ripping me in itty bitty pieces, and lighting me on fire! Hmmm… maybe Alice will see something bad happen and warn me. Or she'll keep this information to herself and enjoy watching me die… She'd never do that me!

"Hey Alice did you see anything happening to the plan in the near future?"

"Umm…" Oh no! Her eyes are all shifty and suspicious. Edward is going to kill me! We should just abort the mission now! "No I didn't see anything go wrong." Phew that's a relief! Alice plastered a huge goofy grin on her face. She can be so silly at times. With that I went to find Jasper and Carlisle.

Alice P.O.V.

That was way too close! I almost ruined the entire mission. Good thing Emmett is as dumb as a doorknob! Okay so its 4:15 now and we will all be in Edward's room by 5:00. Edward will be back in the house by the end of Emmett's song. Now to get everything ready…

Step one; I'll need to get Esme out of the back yard away from her precious garden. I also need to find a way to keep her busy. Now how will I do this? Hmm… I wonder if Esme would want a makeover.

Esme P.O.V.

Edward will be very angry once he sees what the others did to his room. I want no part in this plan whatsoever! I will be fine in my garden, away from all that hullabaloo. Who comes up with words like that? I mean really, when will anyone use that in a sophisticated conversation? If only the kids would…

"Esme?" I turned and I saw Alice sitting next to me staring at one of Carlisle's upside down flowers. "You want a makeover?" Oh dear god…

"Well, honey I really ca- "She was giving me "the look". Grrrr… she knows that's my only weakness. It's almost as bad as Emmett's weakness for Barbies.

"Please! I'll be gentile!" How does she do that? That look is like locking me in a room with a human if I hadn't hunted in, like a month! I can't refuse!

"What do you say, mom?" GASP! She called me mom! AWWW!!!! This is one of the happiest moments in my eternal life! I gave her a bone crushing hug. Well it would be if we weren't vampires.

"I would be happy if you gave me a makeover." I dragged her to her feet, walked us to her room. Once we got inside she locked the doors and dragged me into her room. When I sat on her bed she started pulling out all of these metal boxes with chains on them. I certainly did NOT buy these. Hey what is she pulling out of there?

"Alice I thought you said you would be gentile!" She was walking toward me with shiny metal things. Is that eyeliner? DEAR GOD NO!

"CARLISLE!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!"

Emmett's POV

"Spider pig," Jump "spider pig," Duck and roll "does whatever a spider pig does," crawl, crawl, crawl. "Can he swing on a web?" dive under the couch "No he can't…" Suddenly Alice's little foot was in my way. When I looked up Alice's face was looking down on me.

"Emmett," I stood up and now I was looking down on her. "What the heck do you think you're doing?"

"Hey I was looking for Jasper!" she gave me the "do I look like an idiot to you?" "Well, at least I wasn't torturing Esme!" At that moment Carlisle walked Esme down the stairs. Carlisle looked worried and Esme had a vacant look on her face. Was she limping? It looked like she got mugged by a drunken makeup artist! A vampire makeup artist… a drunken vampire artist... Yeahhhhhh.

"Alice, what did you _do_ to her?" Poor Esme. At that moment Jasper walked down the stairs.

"Emmett I need your help with something." As I followed Jasper up the stairs to help him barricade the windows. "Hey Jasper, do you think Edward can get through the reinforced steel we're putting on these windows?" "Maybe. It depends on his sheer anger and how badly he want's to kill you with his bear hands."

WHAT?!?

**Hey guys I am so so so so **_**so**_** sorry it took me this long to update, and that this is super short (along with every other chapter) It's just I wanted to wait until my BETA reader came back (she won't be back for, like another week and a half), but I got a few requests to post right away. The next chapter will not take this long I swear! Ugo Hale**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Must I really spell it out for you every time? Fine, the right's are not mine please don't sue. Happy?**

**Emmett's P.O.V.**

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?"

Jasper was as calm as before but had a slight smile playing on his lips. "I said it depends on how pissed off Edward is at you."

"What do you mean? If I go down I'm bringing all of you down with me!" That will make them realize how serious this is!

"Ah, but there is where you plan spirals out of your control, you see Edward will know it's all you, thus resulting in you being the main target." Jasper was saying this like it's as obvious as me being awesome.

"But what about after I'm set on fire? What will Edward do to you?" He thought for a moment. Put the metal on the window and said "Well you won't have to worry about that if you put this on nice and tight."

Once we got it up and secure he turned back to me and said. "But if you want to make sure he won't get in I think you may want to double check every door and window."

As he was about to walk out the door and said "Oh and make sure you leave one way open so Alice can get Bella."

As soon as he left I ran around to every possible way Edward may able to get in. Maybe I can put those stinky werewolves's outside the house. Naw I don't wanna suck up to some furry guys that need to take a shower.

I went down stairs to the living room. Esme was sitting on the couch and Carlisle was running about doing things for Esme. She still had that weird vacant look on her face. When Carlisle went into the kitchen I sat down next to Esme.

"Hello? Is anybody in there?" She just kept looking ahead. I waved my hand in front of her face. Nothing. What did Alice do to her?

"Emmett! Don't touch your mother!" Carlisle stuck his head out from the kitchen.

"Fine, fine!" I sat there brooding. Did we go over everything? We blocked all possible exits and entries except for one, so Alice can get Bella. All that's left is to get Esme out of her zombie like state and get this show on the road. I kneeled in front of Esme so I would look her straight in the eye.

"Esme?" She didn't move an inch. "Esme, it's time to get up Alice won't hurt you." Still she didn't even flinch. Alright time to pull out the big guns.

"MOM?!"

She looked at me but said nothing. Damn the mom thing didn't even work. I have a brilliant idea! I might get in trouble for this but this is for the greater good. I took an unnecessary large breath and said every curse word I knew. **(I'm not going to write that because I could get in a lot of trouble for that.)**

As soon as the first word came out of my mouth she looked at me and she got angrier and angrier as I went on. "EMMETT MACARTY CULLEN! HOW DARE YOU USE SUCH LANGUAGE!" Carlisle looked relived and I rapped Esme in a big hug.

"Glad to have ya back." Esme looked surprised the smiled and then turned to me and said "Thank you Emmett, but if you ever use that kind of language again you will not be able to speak for a week!" At that moment Carlisle came over and gave Esme a kiss in the lips (ew) and a hug.

Well it's time to put my plan in action. "Cullen's ASSEMBLE!" I hope Edward didn't hear that. Okay so everyone is here? Coolio! Okay time to put on the leader face. Try to picture Carlisle or Edward when he's being bossy… okay got it!

"Okay it's time to get this thing on the road! Remember to block your minds at all times!" I thought of Rose. That will keep that rat out of my head! "Okay everyone got your mind blocked?" Everyone nodded "Great! Alice you're going to keep watch for Edward."

Alice stood up and saluted "Rodger!" and when I blinked she wasn't there.

"Hey! Who's He?!" Jasper was about to go after her but Carlisle grabbed his shoulder and told him to sit down.

"Rose, you need to back up Alice, and when she gets a hold of Bella you need to blockade the door as fast as you can!"

"Got it!" then she was gone as fast as Alice disappeared.

"Esme I want you to lay down a bit, you got me? Don't do anything. We go it under control." She nodded and gave Carlisle a quick peck on the cheek and laid back down along the couch. This leaves Me, Carlisle and Jasper.

"Now, we are going to take care of Edward's door. We don't know if it's trapped, super duty metal, or once we open it something will attack us. So let's get started!" We went up the stairs and stood in front of Edward's door.

"Hey Emmett," I turned and looked at Jasper. "Why don't you try kicking in the door?"

"Hey, that's a great idea!" Jasper smiled and Carlisle shook his head. Oh well. Steady… aim…

"STOP!" I turned to look at whoever yelled, and I kicked Jasper instead of the door. He crashed into the wall on the other side of the hall. Ha ha he went really far!

"Emmett! What the Carlisle?!" Jasper said once he pulled himself out of the rubble.

"Sorry." I didn't mean it. That was so amazingly funny!

"Wipe that stupid grin off your face you-"

"Jasper don't take that tone with your brother after he apologized!" I love Esme; she's the best foster mom ever! "And Emmett don't kick your brother again."

"I didn't mean to! It was all Jasper's fault anyway." The last part of that I mumbled 'cause I didn't want Esme to yell at me.

"Esme how do you know it's rigged?" Carlisle asked.

"Well Edward set it up last time Emmett pulled one of his little stunts." She turned and looked at me. Good times, good times… "When I went in his room to clean I got trapped in a metal box and couldn't get out. When he got home he got a stern talking to!" Thank goodness for Esme!

Goodness… Who's goodness? It could be anyone's goodness. I mean, it could be "thanks for the goodness of vampires." for all I know. Hmmm… I'll ponder on that later because now I have work to do!

Esme was already in Edward's room, and was signaling us to come in. Once we were all in we started grabbing whatever CD's we got our hands on and started sorting through them.

Panic! At the disco…

My chemical Romance…

Plain White T's…

Fall out boy should be here somewhere!

Snow Patrol

The white stripes

OMC! WHERE IS MY FALL OUT BOY!

GASP Here it is! Awww, I've missed you so much! cough, cough I turned to face Jasper.

"Dude, your emotions for that CD are odd and pathetic."

"Hey at least I'm not drooling over Christina Aguilera." Jasper shook his head.

"That's Carlisle, moron!" Oh yeah… I need to remember that.

"By the way did you guys find your CD's yet?" Carlisle turned to us holding up his Christina CD in triumph.

"Yeah I found my Coltrane tapes." Jasper said showing me these tapes with a saxophone on it. Okay so we're all happy. This plan is awesome!

"Okay let's get this party started!" I ripped the rest of the CD's off the shelves, and popped my awesome CD in Edward's stereo. I turned the volume up to MAX and started dancing to Thnks Fr Th Mmrs. Carlisle sat on Edward's couch sorting the rest of the CD's I threw on the floor. Jasper stood there and then started bobbing his head to the music.

_**I'm gonna make you bend and break  
Say your prayers, but let the good times roll  
In case god doesn't show (let the good times roll, let the good times roll) **_

AHAHAHAHA! Jasper is dancing! Oh my Carlisle, this is the funniest thing I've ever seen! If I wasn't a vampire I would pee myself I was laughing so hard. **(Now here's the real question, **_**can vamps pee?**_** Yeah I know they're dead, but then what happens to the blood in them? Does it come out at all?) **Ahaha! Now he's singing too! It's really off pitch! I need a video camera, let's see… Edward must have one around here… bingo! I found it!

"_**One night and one more time, yeah  
Thanks for the memories  
Thanks for the memories  
See he tastes like you only sweeter  
ooooooooh"**_

He was bobbing his head and jumping around. Carlisle was watching him like he was crazy. Then Jasper looked up from his little dance party and stopped where he was. When Carlisle and I started laughing he hung his head and walked away. He's probably going to go cry to Alice.

That was great, and the best part is I got it on film! Muhahaha! That is defiantly going on youtube.

When the song stopped that's when I heard it. Edward was home (insert evil face here).

**So Here you go I'm SO sorry it took so long for the other chapter. guess what? MY BETA READER IS BACK! YAY!Ugohale0413**


	8. Chapter 8

I am sure all of you know this story is NOT mine but I wish it was. So if I must repeat it here it goes. Not mine don't sue. Is that what will make you happy? God you copyright people suck.

Alice P.O.V.

There they are right on cue! Edward's getting Bella out and… Now! I ran toward Bella, but I was going so fast all she saw was a blur. Perfect Edward didn't see this coming. I ran past Rose who was fighting to get the door closed. Ha, ha like he'll get in! Bella doesn't look so good maybe I should put her on her feet. Ugh… She's too slow; I'll need to drag her up these stairs if she goes any slower!

"Alice what the hell is going on?" Aww poor Bella looks so scared. Rosalie has everything under control. Edward was still fighting to get in, but he can't get past our Rosie!

"Don't let Esme hear you talking like that, we still need her to protect us from Edward." She's been through so much today I don't know what she'll do! I pulled Bella into Edward's room, and from behind me I heard Bella.

"My god what did you do?"

Emmett stopped jumping on Edward's couch and ran over to Bella.

"Hey Bella!" Bella jut looked around the room in utter shock.

"Isn't it beautiful?" He said while putting his arm over her shoulder. I had to admit it was. Oh this is so exciting! I'm going to go look for my CD!

"I like to call it," He took his arm off Bella, jumped on the couch, struck a pose and said "The most awesomest plan in the history of Emmett's plans." And I thought Emmett couldn't make himself sound any stupider.

Hey look at Jasper! "Nice cape honey!"

Bella P.O.V.

I couldn't believe what was in front of me. Edward's room was in shambles! His CD's were all over the ground, his walls had holes in them, and Emmett was in the process of ripping off the curtains to make capes for him and Jasper.

I went to Carlisle who was sorting through CD's. "Carlisle what is this?" I pointed at everything around us. Carlisle smiled and dazzled me for a moment. Now I see where Edward got his charming powers.

"Well I think you should ask Emmett, he's the mastermind of this operation." WHAT? Emmett isn't a mastermind; his mind barely works when he needs it to. How'd he pull all this off, and drag the family into it too?

"Emmett, come here a sec." Emmett turned from tying the curtain around Jasper's neck. "Sure Bella, what do you need?"

"I need to know what's going on," He looked a little worried when I said that. "NOW EMMETT!" I don't like not knowing what's going on.

"Well…" and Emmett told me everything. How Edward stole his CD, how all of the windows, vents and doors are blocked, and how he want's to use me as a human peace offering.

"So when Edward comes into the house ready to kill me we're going to use your dazzling abilities on him."… What?

"So you want _me,_ a human, to take on a furious vampire who will be on a rampage?" I did not like the sound of this plan. AT. ALL.

"Well when you put it like that…" Emmett started scratching his head, that's when Alice turned me to look at her. "Bella its okay, I've seen what's going to happen."

"But aren't your visions not always right?" Oops she looks hurt. I didn't mean it like that!

"Bella, Bella, Bella, you need to trust me. Just do everything I say and everything will be fine." I feel much better. Wait, maybe that's Jasper…

"Hey guys," Carlisle was staring at a CD. "Is this anyone's?" He held up South Park: Chef Aid. OMC, how'd he find that? I thought I had that hidden. I ran over to Carlisle and took it from his hands. I felt my famous blush creep onto my cheeks.

"Bella," Emmett sounded shocked, "You like South Park?"

Alice was giggling, and it looked like Jasper wasn't enjoying the heavy waves of embarrassment rolling off of me. I mouthed "I'm sorry" and he nodded his head.

"Bella," Esme sounded appalled and I cringed I never wanted to hear her talk to me like that again, "How can you like such vulgar and tasteless nonsense?" She just shook her head and walked toward Carlisle.

"Well Charlie started watching it and I watched it with him and…" This didn't sound convincing at all. "well... It's not my fault Edward took it without asking!" Emmett smiled.

"So are you in?"

"Yeah I guess I'm in" What have I just gotten myself into?

**Carlisle POV**

As I searched through the CD's a saw a few I recognized, but I think I'm going through the "newer music". Frank Sinatra? Is he a new rapper? Hey!

"Esme look it's our hairspray CD!" Esme ran over and plucked the CD from my hands.

"I've been looking all over the house for this! I thought I had thrown it out the last time we moved! I was devastated." Esme and I love this play! Once for our anniversary we went to go see this with its original cast. It was fabulous!

I stood up and took the CD from Esme and put it in Edward's CD player.

"Hey!" I turned to look at Emmett. Well, he's the only one who want's to listen to Fall Out Boy. Ah the familiar saxophone drifted through the air and my darling Esme started singing "Good Morning Baltimore". She can impersonate Tracie's nasally voice almost perfectly, but it sounds like an angel's voice coming from Esme.

"Oh, oh, oh  
Woke up today  
Feeling the way I always do!"

Now I have to join in!

"Oh, oh, oh   
Hungry for something  
That I can't eat"

We started dancing together while everyone watched

"Then I hear that beat  
The rhythm of town  
Starts calling me down  
It's like a message from  
High above  
Oh, oh, oh  
Pulling me out   
To the smiles and the  
Streets that I love…"

Suddenly Alice stiffened on the other side of the room and everyone stopped. Jasper put his hands on her shoulders to keep her steady. The music was the only thing that broke the silence. When Alice finally jostled out of her vision and grabbed me and pulled into her room.

Alice P.O.V. 

This is going to be great! I grabbed Carlisle and headed toward my room. Okay it was Jaspers room too but he didn't like going in there to much. He says pink hurts his eyes. I got to work as fast as a vampire could start. I got all my clothes from the 60's out and started to go through the bags and bags… and bags of clothes when I found two matching outfits. Perfect! I found the perfect accessories and did Carlisle's makeup (yes, makeup). Then I found a wig that was huge in the 60's. It was ratted up and had flowers in it. I plopped it onto Carlisle's head.

"Put these clothes on and don't look at yourself!" I commanded him with my "scary voice". I pushed Carlisle into the bathroom and waited.

"Alice, why are you making me wear a dress?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out!"

He came out of the bath room and did a little spin. Hmmm… something isn't right…

"Ah, HA!" I snapped my fingers and got a few pairs of socks, and stuffed them down Carlisle's shirt.

"Perfect!" Oh this is so exciting, now for Esme.

"Carlisle go wait in your room, I need to work with Esme."

At that moment Carlisle left the room, then stuck his head back in,

"Please be gentile, whatever you did before really shook her up."

"Of course," He looked at me skeptically

"Scouts honor," He smirked and kept walking. Good thing I was never a scout! Or was I?

I ran into Edward's room where Emmett was acting crazy, Jasper was being super hot, Bella was tripping over nothing and Esme was still singing along with Hairspray. Everything was perfect.

I grabbed Esme by the waist and she started kicking and screaming. I threw her over my shoulder and she screamed so loud that if it was possible for my eardrums to explode they would of!

"NO! NOT AGAIN! ALICE HAVE MERCY!" She was flailing but was no match for me.

OW! She was scratching at my back!

"PUT ME DOWN!" OMC! Esme turned evil like a scene from the exorcist!

"Esme calm down I need you to change your outfit that's all!" She stopped and let go a large breath of air.

"No make over?"

"Nope."

"No crazy hair-do?"

"Well…"

"YOU'LL NEVER TALK ME ALIVE!" and in a flash she was gone. This was going to be hard…

**Edward P.O.V.**

Gah! How could I not see this? This plan just reeks of Emmett. The thought of the name makes… well I can't say blood boil. I wonder what that would taste like… I shook my head to get myself focused. Suddenly a vision from Alice hit me like a wall of bricks.

_A woman was singing with Esme. Suddenly a sock fell out of the weird girl's shirt. Oh my Carlisle, IT'S CARLISLE!_

shudders That was all I needed to see. I jumped as high as I could and landed on the roof. There are a few skylights that I could break through, wait there is some steel. I'll just punch harder. Skylight one goes to living room, skylight 2 goes to the kitchen and the third skylight goes to Emmett's room. Maybe I'll have some fun before I set Emmett on fire!

_What will Edward do to Emmett's room?_

_Will Esme be captured?_

_Why is Carlisle in a dress? _

_FIND OUT IN THE NEXT CHAPTER! _

**Hey guys! I am so sorry I haven't updated in forever. There is school and it's my first year of high school so it's all so new, and I completely forgot about my fanfictions. I think this is the longest chapter so far, this shows I am a huge and utter newbie. I am already starting the next chapter which is going to be the last or the chapter before the last so… Rock on my friends, rock on.**

**UGO!**


	9. Chapter 9

**These Characters aren't mine**.

**Yeah I don't post I suck.**

Alice pov

She's around here somewhere… We've been looking for Esme for, like, 5 minutes now! Ugh... I would of found Bella 4 minutes 59 seconds ago!

"Alice?" I spun to see Jasper. His eyes were worried. "Why don't you take it easy on Esme, you put her through a lot today." I looked down, ashamed. "Don't you remember when you gave me my first make over? I wouldn't talk to you until I got that hair dye out of my hair." I chuckled and Jasper glared at me a little but then his eyes softened. "What I'm trying to say is just let Esme wear a wig if it means _that_ much to you."

"But… I really-"I stopped. Jasper's eyes were loving, yet demanding. "Oh alright!" I yelled to the air "You can wear a wig if you want, Esme!" Suddenly Esme was standing in front of me. "Come on." I grabbed Esme's wrist and dragged her into my room.

"Thank you Jasper!"

"Anytime." He turned around and walked into Edward's room. I turned to Esme.

"Okay so I'm going to-"BOOM Me and Esme jumped into each others arms.

"Emmett! Stand still we need to pat out the flames on your back!" That was Rosalie.

"Oh My Carlisle! I'm on fire? GET IT OUT, GET IT OUT, GET IT OUT!!!"

"Well it doesn't sound like they need any help, let's get that wig on!" I dragged Esme into my room. Okay so I think I have a brunette wig that is ratted up. Hmm… I walked into my closet and started grabbing random boxes. Aha!

"Okay, Esme, you get to choose if you want the blond Penny wig or the ratted up Tracie wig."

"Oh! I want the Tracie wig!" I placed it on her head; it's a little crooked, a little to the left… Perfect!

"Okay I'm going to go into Edward's room and put on a song come in when you hear the music."

Esme nodded and I walked into what used to be Edward's room. I think that they blew up most of the light bulbs in his room. Bella was sitting on the couch with a blanket on her head; She looked homeless. Rosalie was sitting next to her laughing at Emmett and Jasper's ridiculous song and dance. Emmett and Jasper had their shirts tied up, long blond wigs, and were jumping up and down singing Spice Girls.

"La la la la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la

When you're feeling  
Sad and low  
We will take you

Where you gotta go  
Smiling dancing  
Everything is free  
All you need is positivity" 

… Wow. It was all I could say. This had to be the dumbest thing I've ever seen.

Esme was standing in the doorway. "I thought I was singing hairsp-" Esme looked at Emmett and Jasper "Alice what are the doing?"

"Singing…"

"Colors of the world  
Spice up your life  
Every boy and every girl   
Spice up your life  
People of the world  
Spice up your life  
ahh" 

This is great. I am laughing really hard… but not nearly as hard as Bella. Woh, Bella is laughing so hard I think she isn't breathing! I went over to Bella and started shaking to her.

"BREATHE! BREATHE BELLA!" She gasped a huge breath and started to calm down. 

"La la la la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la la la  
La la la la la la la

Yellow man in Timbuktu  
Color for both me and you  
Kung fu fighting   
Dancing Queen  
Tribal spaceman  
And all that's in between 

Colors of the world  
Spice up your life  
Every boy and every girl   
Spice up your life  
People of the world  
Spice up your life  
ahh!!! 

I heard Carlisle about to come in. NO! I ran and grabbed Carlisle, who was still in drag.

"I heard a lot of noise and-" I cut him off

"You don't come in until you hear Hairspray! I want this to be a surprise."

"Oh okay…" I pushed him back into the bathroom. 

"Stay!" and with that I went back into Edward's room.

"Slam it to the left  
If you're having a good time  
Shake it to the right   
If you know that you feel fine  
Chicas to the front  
Huh huh go round

Flamenco  
Lambada  
But hip-hop is harder   
We moonwalk the foxtrot  
Then polka the salsa

Shake it, shake it, shake  
Haka  
Shake it shake it shake it  
Haka   
Arriba

I think that was the only time I have ever seen Jasper shimmy, and I like it. insert devilish look here apparently Jasper felt my emotions and His head quickly snapped in my direction. Ha, ha. It's fun to toy with my Jazzy-poo. I gave him a little wave and he smirked.

Slam it to the left  
If you're having a good time  
Shake it to the right   
If you know that you feel fine  
Chicas to the front  
Huh huh go round  
Slam it to the left  
If you're having a good time   
Shake it to the front  
If you know that you feel fine  
Chicas to the front  
(Huh huh)  
Hi Ci Ya, hold tight

Slam it to the left  
If you're having a good time  
Shake it to the right  
If you know that you feel fine  
Chicas to the front  
Huh huh go round"

Everyone stood and clapped while Emmett and Jasper took their bows. Mid bow Emmett's wig fell off. Jasper came beside me and gave me a kiss. I gave him a squeeze and walked over to CD player and put on Welcome to the 60's from Hairspray.

I stood on the couch and yelled so Esme and Carlisle could here (which wasn't that loud).

"Ladies and … Well now all the guys are either dressed in drag or trying to break in so… Welcome Edna Turnblad and Tracie Turnblad!"

At that moment Carlisle and Esme walked in. Every one in the room fell to the ground laughing. Carlisle was turning and posing. It was hilarious. Bella wasn't breathing again.

"BREATHE BELLA! BREATHE!" Bella was a pink/red/purplish color. Then she gasped and started to turn back to her normal color. This girl will be the… well never mind.

"Hey mama hey mama,  
Look around  
Everybody's groovin' to a brand new sound   
Hey mama hey mama,  
Follow me  
I know something's in you   
That you wanna set free  
So let so, go, go of the past now   
Say hello to the love in your heart  
Yes, I know that the world's spinning fast now  
You gotta get yourself a brand new start!"

Damn! Esme can belt it! Oh no! I forgot about the backup singer people! Hmmm

"Jasper, Emmett, Rose follow my lead. Bella learn to breathe!" 

I stood up besides Carlisle and Esme who are acting the play step by step. And joined in with Esme and Rose and Emmett did too. Jasper was a little hesitant, but he joined in.

"Hey mama, welcome to the 60's  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Oh mama, welcome to the 60's  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Go mama, go, go, go!

Welcome to the 60's  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,   
Hey mama  
Yeah, yeah, yeah,  
Yeah, yeah, yeah!"

Emmett started to really get into this. I think he's a transsexual at heart.

"Hey mama, hey mama,  
Take my hand

First let's make a pit stop  
At the wiener stand"

Emmett started to giggle here. Everyone glared at him, and he stopped.

"Hey mama, hey mama,  
Take a chance Oh Tracy, it's been years   
Since someone asked me to dance So let go, so, go of the past now  
Say hello to the light in your eyes  
Yes, i know that the world's  
Spinning fast now  
But you gotta run the race  
To win the prize"

Ha ha I love our Family. I wonder if Edward is anywhere near getting in? Hmmm… I screamed "EDWARD!!!" in my head. I wonder if that slowed him down…

**Edward P.O.V.**

I am so close to getting in. I can feel the metal giving way! What's annoying is that when I want them to shut off their minds they become louder but when I really need to hear their thoughts they-

"EDWARD!!!!!!!"

AHH! I looked around for Alice but she wasn't there. Oh, she's evil. Suddenly my foot slipped from under me and started to slide down the side of the roof. SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! thud I lied on the ground for a moment trying to suppress the urge to kill. Great the sprinklers are on… WHY DO WE EVEN HAVE SPRINKLERS?!? IT RAINS 24/7! I grabbed the closest one and ripped it out of the ground.

"ALICE YOU SUCK!" I screamed to the air in frustration.

**Alice P.O.V. **

I turned on the sprinklers and started to walk up the stairs. Why we have sprinklers I will never understand.

"ALICE YOU SUCK!" I could hear Eddie from out side. Muhahaha. When I walked up the stairs Carlisle and Esme were still singing. I walked over and sat next to Bella who was giggling her little head off. 

"Dontcha let nobody  
Try to steal your fun  
'Cause a little touch of lipstick  
Never hurt no one"

Emmett tried to put lipstick on Carlisle and he punched him in the face. HAHAHA! "Bella BREATHE!" She was gasping for breath again.Hey Tracy, hey baby,  
Look at me!  
I'm the cutest chickie  
That ya ever did see

Hey Tracy, hey baby,  
Look at us  
Where is there a team  
That's half as fabulous?!

I let go, go. Go of the past now  
Said hello to this red carpet ride  
Yes I know that the world's spinning fast now  
Tell lollabrigida to step aside! Your mama's welcoming the 60's  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh  
Oh your mama's welcoming the 60's  
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh  
Go, mama, go, go, go!"

Carlisle was dancing around and suddenly his sock fell out of his top. He scooped it up and put it back into his shirt.

Hey mama welcome to the 60's!"

Everyone collapsed on the floor with laughter. Carlisle took out the socks in his shirt and his took off the wig he had. Ha ha ha! That was great.

Emmett's P.O.V.

That was the weirdest, funniest, craziest thing I have ever seen. Ha ha… Okay now Carlisle is kissing Esme. Ewwwww… Carlisle still kinda looks like a girl! Ew! Must… ruin… MOMENT!

"Alright you guys get a room!" Carlisle and Esme broke apart and stared into each other's eyes. I found my Fall Out Boy CD and popped it into the CD player.

"BACK TO FALL OUT BOY!"

Woo! This Ain't A Scene it's an Arms Race!

I started to jump on the couch and Jasper started to dance next to me. How can this go wrong?

Edward's P.O.V.

I finally got in! Finally I'm back on the roof, and I got past the stupid metal crap that is everywhere. Emmett is going to pay, but that's for later insert evil look. I walked through Emmett's room trying to find out if they heard me come in. They are playing the music way to loud! It's going to blow the speakers! I listened for a moment… Fall Out Boy. A snarling sound escaped my mouth

"Emmett."

I walk through the hallways a quietly as possible.

"This Ain't a Scene it's a GODDAMN-"

"EMMETT!"

"-Arms race!"

I can't wait to see his face. I was standing in front of the door of my room. I kick down the door and everyone froze. Carlisle had makeup on (I guessing that's from what I saw in Alice's vision), Esme had her hair ratted up, Jasper was trying to send calming waves toward me, which didn't work, Alice had an evil grin, Rosalie was bored, my dear sweet Bella looked down at the ground, and Emmett stood on my couch looking like a dear in the head lights.

I'm a leading man  
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate,  
Oh so intricate.

The music was still drifting throughout the room.

Then I pounced and Emmett's scream matched the one at the end of the song.

**Hey guys here's your Chapter and it's mostly songs. I'm sorry! I posted a story my friend Tess forced me to write. It's about Tess and her torturing Jake and the Cullens. Thanks for reading! UGO! **


	10. Chapter 10

"**Jasper?"**

"**Yes, UgoHale0143?"**

"**Will you be mine?"**

**weird look from Jasper**

"**Ummmmm. no."**

"**Damn. I don't own any of these characters."**

**Edwards POV**

"Emmett I hate you!" I started to scratch at his face.

"NOT THE FACE!" Rosalie screamed from the sidelines.

"Have mercy!" Emmett said while trying to squirm away.

"Edward! Get off your brother! You really brought this upon your-" I turned to glare her. Everyone stiffened; even Bella who was looking at the ground could to feel the intensity of my glare. If Esme doesn't shut her trap she will meet the same fate as Emmett.

"Are you going to stay quiet?" Esme said nothing. "Good." I turned back to Emmett. "DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE, DIE!" I lost all control. My anger grew so large that I let my instinct take over as if I was hunting... and Emmett was the prey. Muahahahahah!!!

Then I heard crying. It wasn't from Rose, whose eyes were full of anger, hate and fear all at the same time, but from Bella. My Bella. I'm making her cry. This is what brought me back to reality. I looked at my family. If Esme could cry she would, Alice had a little smirk on her face, and Jasper looked pissed and ashamed. That was exactly how I was feeling. Then I turned and looked at Emmett.

"Goodbye cruel world! I shall miss thee! Rose, sweet Rose, I love you with the whole of my non-beating heart! Carlisle you rock, Jasper you need to lighten up... a lot," Jasper scowled "Alice you are pure evil. Edward, you need to bite Bella sooner rather than later!" I slapped him across the face and realized how ridiculous this scene was. I stood up, off of lowly creature below me. "Ow!"

"Emmett I could be sooo much worse. But, I'm actually going to let you live." I snarled.

"YOU REALLY DO LOVE ME!" He went to give me a hug and I punched him in the face then kicked him in the gut before he could get anywhere near me.

Bella held her arms open and I walked into her warm embrace. "I love you." I said.

Emmett then tried to hug me (and Bella) again which resulted in more bodily harm towards him. Everyone backed out of the room slowly to leave me and Bella alone.

**Later that day Emmett POV**

Ugh. I hate cleaning. I don't know how Esme cleans non-stop like that.

"You know Emmett you wouldn't need to clean if you didn't trash my room."

"Yeah, well, I wouldn't have trashed your room if you didn't steal my CD," I threw the glass in the black trash bag "and I don't see everyone else who helped me wreck your room doesn't have to clean!" Edward cocked his head to the side in thought, and his eyes lightened a bit.

"Hey everyone, come here!" Slowly, everyone dragged themselves into my room.

"Whaddya want?" Rosalie sounded agitated (surprise, surprise).

"Okay, if I make you all clean up with Emmett just because he wants you to help him, what would you do?"

Everyone thought about the question at hand.

Alice said, "Well I'd tell everyone that it was Emmett who took my Fergie CD, not Edward."

Everyone looked at me.

"Who are you?" Jasper asked, appalled. It's not my fault I like to get my groove on unlike some stuck up know-it-alls!

"Groove? Emmett that saying died with the 70's!"

DAMN YOU! Edward smirked in the stupid way that he does. I glared back at Alice.

"Aw, come on Alice! Because of that you are staying and cleaning with me!"

"Oh yeah? Who came back from the grave and deemed you king of my affairs?"

"I did!" Edward raised his hand, "and you're staying to clean." Alice shot him a mad look. "As far as I know, you're Emmett's right hand man… woman… vampire, WHATEVER. Maybe I just like to watch you squirm. Who knows?"

Alice was appalled. She made a face which looked like she had gas, was trying to pass a kidney stone and was told she maxed out her credit card all at once. Time to take a mental picture! click ah, priceless. Then she turned towards me and let her wrath out. I couldn't help but crack up at the scene of little pixie Alice being furious.

"What are you laughing at Mr. Fergalicious?" She took the bag of trash out of my hand and dumped it on the ground.

"Hey I just cleaned that!"

"I bet I could clean this room faster then you can with one hand tied behind my back!

"Make it both hands and we have a deal!"

Alice had an evil gleam in her eye, "You're on!"

Edward came up with rules for us. Oh _please_ make one rule wearing an ugly orange jumpsuit! That would crush Alice. Edward threw a glance my way.

"Rule 1: you need to wear." Edward looked at me. YES! He's going to go with the stupid orange jumpsuit! ". a really puffy ballroom dress!"

. Ballroom dress.

Alice jumped and clapped as I just sat. Puffy dress?

"What the F-Carlisle?!" I yelled. Esme was about to say something else but she couldn't. Carlisle's not a swear ha ha!

"Well Emmett, we all know how you like to dress up so here!" Edward threw a large mass of pink frills and itchy fabric at me.

I paused to look at it. Where and when did he get this? "This is not a dress,"- I looked at Edward "This is a circus tent!"

Then Alice burst into the room (when did she leave?) in a large Black and Purple dress. The dress was just as big as mine! I was surprised that she didn't get stuck in the door!

"Come on Emmett! Go get dressed!" Alice said in a sing-song voice. Yeah... just _try_ and make me wear this. I dare you.

"Oh, and Emmett," I heard Edward from behind me. I turned to glare at him and more pink came at my face. "Here's your crown and shoes."

The stupid pink crown was like a foot and a half high! All together the dress and everything weighed around 350 pounds! Not that I'm complaining, but really, how could normal person be able to wear this?

15 minutes later

It took me freaking 15 minutes to get in the goddamn dress! When I came out everyone was waiting in Edward's room for me to appear. Edward, Bella and Jasper started laughing the second I walked in. Rose on the other had looked at me and scowled.

"Emmett." I looked over at my lovely wife. "you look like a fairy godmother."

"Uh. thanks?" I replied. I didn't pick out this dress! Why does she look pissed at me? I went over and asked her what was wrong.

"Well. I picked out the dress and it doesn't fit right." LE GASP I feel betrayed! This... _thing_ was HER idea?

I stormed away from Rose and walked over to Edward. I just wanna hurry up and get this over with.

"Alright, here are the rules; Who ever is able to clean my room fastest wins. I expect all the furniture put back together, the drapes mended and my stereo fixed." He turned to look at us both. "Anything you need to clean will be given to you, you're able to use your credit cards if needed, and Alice you can't use your hands." He went to sit down. "Oh- I forgot to add, Emmett if you change out of your dress you're disqualified."

Awww. I looked at Alice who had her hands handcuffed behind her back.

"You're going down Emmett!"

"In your dreams, Alice!"

And so it begins.

**(Should I end here? NAW!)**

"GO!" Bella shouted from the side lines. I started to work as fast as I could to get all the trash off the ground. As soon as I did that I looked for the garbage. Where is it?

"Guys where's the garbage?"

"Here you go." Edward threw a box of garbage bags at me.

I tried to open a bad while holding all of this crap in my hands. I couldn't so I had to drop all of the stuff on the ground and then pick it all back up. At least I'm doing better then Alice!

**Alice POV**

I could easily break through these handcuffs, but where's the fun in that? Emmett has a head start, but he's breaking more things as he goes along! He's such an oaf. Hahaha oaf... what a fun word.

"I agree, Alice" I heard from Edward.

About the word or Emmett being one, I thought.

"Both," Edward cracked a smile.

Hmmm. What should I do from here? Well I could keep kicking Emmett so he got nothing clean. But then I wouldn't get anything done. Ooh I know!

"Bella can you open that window?" Everyone turned to look at me. Bella got up slowly, walked to the window and open it for me. "Thanks doll face!" I went over to the window and started to sing a few notes out of the window.

**Bella Pov**

What the hell is Alice doing now? She's wasting so much time! Even if Emmett is breaking Edward's stuff instead of fixing it, singing won't make things much better! Alice brought her head back inside and a mob of birds, rabbits, deer and all types of animals came crashing into the house. Oh God. Edward scooped me into his arms.

"What's that for?" Edward took his eyes off the animals now scampering through his room.

"Do I need a reason?" He had a smirk on his face, "and who knows if any of these animals have rabies or some other disease?" His eyes bore in to mine and I started to forget everything that was going on around me. Suddenly his eyes snapped to Jasper.

"Jasper," Jasper was stalking a fuzzy little squirrel. He looked at Edward with dark, hungry, cold eyes. "Can you refrain eating that squirrel until Bella leaves?" He looked from Edward to the squirrel to me and nodded.

Crash! We turned to look at Emmett who crashed into Edward's book shelf and was scrambling to pick everything back up. I looked at Alice who had a circle of animals around her.

"All right everyone, time to tidy things up!" She said to the little woodland creatures.

"Edward what is Alice doing?"

"I have no clue."

"Come my little friends  
As we all sing a happy little working song" She was dancing around the room, all the little creatures following and cleaning with her. Emmett was sprawling all over the place trying to keep up, but he just kept on breaking things as he went along.

"Merry little voices clear and strong  
Come and roll your sleeves up  
So that we can fix the gloom  
'Cause we wrecked Ed's room!  
As we sing along."

It looked like a Disney movie vomited in Edward's room. The little creatures were much better at cleaning then Emmett. I looked at Jasper to see him staring at the little squirrel again.

"How we all enjoy letting loose with a little  
La-da-da-dum-dum  
While we're emptying the vacu-um  
It's such fun to hum  
A happy working song  
Oo-ooh  
A happy working song"

"If one of those animals poos on my carpet they're going to be my breakfast." Edward mumbled.

"Well if they did they would probably clean it up right after so you have nothing to worry about!" I said brightly.

"You could do a lot when you got  
Such a happy little tune to hum  
While you're sponging up the soapy scum  
We adore each filthy chore  
That we determine  
So friends even though you're vermin  
We're a happy working song

Singing as we fetch the detergent box  
Or the smelly shirts and the stinky socks  
Sing along  
If you cannot sing then hum along  
As we're finishing our happy working song!"

The room was spotless, and Emmett didn't do a thing.

"Wow." was all I could say.

Emmett sat there speechless. I couldn't see his face because clumps of fabric were blocking his face. All I could hear is a faint "she beat me?" from the fluff of pink.

Alice broke out of her handcuffs and was hanging out the window waving at all the little animals that scampered away. "Thank you!"

Jasper was sitting in the corner, his eyes were black.

"CARLISLE I'M GOING OUT!" And with that he flung himself out the window after the little creatures.

"See you later Jazzy-poo!" Then she turned to Emmett. "Ha ha!! you got pwnd!" Then she walked away. Emmett just lay on the ground. If he could cry, there'd be a river running through the house right now.

"Come on Bella I need your help with a little something." Edward said. His eye's flashed to Emmett and locked back with my eyes. I just smiled and he carried me towards Emmett's room.

**The happy working song isn't mine either, that's the property of Disney. If you haven't already, GO SEE ENCHANTED!!!!!!! ELIZ RULZ!!!!**

**Okay, now that Eliz (my beta reader) got her message out, I am pretty sure the next chapter is the end. I want to finish **_**Tess**_** my, other story. If I don't the real Tess will bother me to death. If you want to add any ideas about Edward's revenge **_hint hint_** just review! **

**Have a spadoinkle day! UGO!**


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